A note on the silly titles: I'm naming them like short stories, which is to say measuring it with my heart. I know it will kill my ranking in search engines, but I don't care. These aren't formatted like 'proper' posts, and they aren't them.

This post exists to elaborate on the previously mentioned expiration date on posts.

You ever hear that writing adage about leaving your writing overnight before editing it? I'm not doing that here. It's been, what, two hours since I published the last post, and already it's aged too much for my liking.

This time it's not a case of my opinions changing (though that does happen frequently), but of wording. The explanation doesn't match my opinion.

This mismatch is like lying. I'm lying to you, the reader, when I say things. Because I am saying things I don't mean. But I can't get the actual point across without distortion. Instead of decaying as it strays further and further from my current self, the previous post was born rotten.


Well, for one, the aforementioned part of brain that deals with speech tends to run multiple instances of itself at once. It's a lot easier to pick between whichever one sounds the closest to what I meant than to do it myself. Make my own metaphor, pick my own wording, it's just too much effort. The post is going to age out in a month anyway. Why should I care?

Rule number five: no consistency. If I write something, I might write the exact opposite the next day. Deal with it.

For another, I can't be sure I actually believe anything that comes out of that generator. Sure, sometimes its insights are useful, but other times it loops phrases I shouldn't write online, or takes up all my thinking space. That might be some kind of mental vocal tic and not the fault of mx. social clippy. Another five months until I'd qualify for a diagnosis though, so it'll be a while until my hypothesis can be tested.

Anyway. The lying thing works better when discussing cyber/meatspace communication. Or maybe it doesn't. Maybe it's the same thing as other figure of speeches except I'm the only one who gets the joke. (when I am paying enough attention to get the joke.)

A quote I enjoy, from Alexander Smith: "The essay as a literary form, resembles the lyric, insofar as it is moulded by some central mood— whimsical, serious or satirical. Give the mood, and the essay from the first sentence to the last, grows around it as the cocoon grows around the silkworm."

I don't know if it is as meaningful to anyone else as it is to me when it comes to this topic. Less fluid selves, more liquid selves. I change, and my opinions, mannerisms, etc. change, depending on the environment. Or maybe that's just my brain associating 'being fluid' with lesbophobia. It probably is, but I still enjoy the quote^1.

To me, the quote can be applied to mean that truth spins from the mood. It's how my brain (currently) works, and if I can't find solutions, I can at least find comfort.

/insert proper ending here


1 - I stumbled across in reading this archived anthology. I didn't get far in it, but maybe you'll have better luck.